In my previous articles, I've shared a very useful little trick:

When you encounter obstacles at work or feel that your brain isn't working, don't just sit at your desk and wrack your brains. It won't help.

What do I do in this situation? I'll stand up and find some simple, hands - on tasks to do, such as getting a glass of water, organizing documents, tidying up items, or even doing some cleaning... and so on.

Generally, when I do this, I often suddenly get a flash of inspiration, some ideas and directions, and it becomes easier to solve the problem.

Similarly, friends who work in creative fields (such as advertising copywriting, creative planning, graphic design, etc.) must have had similar experiences: Many times, we may encounter a creative bottleneck and rack our brains but still can't come up with better ideas. So, what's the better thing to do at this time?

It's not sitting at the desk and thinking hard, nor is it constantly having meetings, discussions, or brainstorming. Instead, it's to put the task aside for a while, do some other lighter things, let your brain relax, and then come back to it after a few days.

During this process, it's very likely that some ideas and creativity that you couldn't think of before will come to you unexpectedly.

In short, creativity often isn't “thought out with effort” but is encountered unexpectedly. It often comes from relaxation rather than exertion.

Another example is when you're thinking about a very complex problem. If you keep “staring” at it intently and struggling with it, you may very likely stay in your fixed mindset and keep going around in circles.

But once you step out, let your brain relax, do something else, and expose yourself to other information, suddenly you may find that you've “jumped out” of the framework and can look at the problem from a completely different perspective, thus finding a brand - new path.

These three scenarios are all based on my personal experience. This is also the theme I want to share with you today: Do things with a relaxed mindset.

When you encounter a complex problem, simply focusing on it and thinking and dealing with it very hard may not actually work. It's more likely to backfire: You spend a lot of time and effort, but the problem doesn't progress. Instead, you're more likely to get stuck in a dead - end.

On the contrary, if you keep your mind more peaceful, live and work as usual, act with a relaxed mindset, and follow your inner call, the result may be better.

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This method may seem very simple, but in fact, it's a very fundamental principle and is crucial in many aspects of life.

Let me give a very interesting example:

In psychology, there's a theory called “the paradox of happiness”. It's a very cutting - edge achievement in the field of positive psychology, referring to the following phenomenon:

The more hard you try to pursue happiness, the more likely you are to feel unhappy.

What does this mean? Suppose there are two situations:

Situation one: Imagine what things you'll feel happier and more fulfilled after achieving. Write down the things you think of and make a list. Then, act according to the plan on the list in the following period.

Situation two: You don't need to consider “what can make me happier”. Instead, live each day according to your own ideas. Then, before the end of each day, take out a pen and paper and list as many “small things that made you feel good” as you can that you discovered and encountered today.

Guess which situation can actually improve your sense of happiness?

Many people may think it's the former, after all, our traditional concepts emphasize that goal - oriented struggle can make people happy.

But the research results are astonishing: In many groups of experiments, those in the former situation generally felt less happy. They would have a sense of urgency and anxiety, feeling pushed to act. Even if they achieved something, they wouldn't feel happy. Instead, they would only think “what's the next goal?”, thus starting another urgent cycle.

On the contrary, the sense of happiness and joy of those in the latter situation steadily increased. They would feel that their lives had become more meaningful, more colorful, and they also had more courage to face difficulties.

This is the inspiration that “the paradox of happiness” gives us: The more you take happiness as a goal, the farther you are from it. On the contrary, only when you don't take happiness as a goal but focus on those beautiful and specific things are you more likely to feel happy.

In other words, the harder you try, the harder it is to truly obtain happiness. On the contrary, the more relaxed you are, the easier it is to approach happiness.

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So, why does this effect occur? Why does working hard sometimes yield worse results than working in a relaxed state?

Generally speaking, there are the following four reasons.

1. Over - exertion leads to over - reliance on convergent thinking, thus restricting your vision.

We have two thinking styles: convergent thinking and divergent thinking. When we enter the “hard - working mode”, we adopt convergent thinking. It's a “point - based” thinking mode that focuses attention on a very small area to think about the ins and outs and causes and effects of things. However, it's not conducive to coming up with other paths and possibilities.

On the contrary, when we enter the “relaxed mode”, the brain adopts divergent thinking. It's a “surface - based” thinking mode that spreads attention over a wider range, like a searchlight scanning the sea of thought.

At this time, many details and possibilities that we usually don't notice will emerge.

Ideally, we should alternate and complement convergent and divergent thinking. However, many times, we often ignore the need to switch thinking styles due to excessive focus. Therefore, deliberately training ourselves to “relax” is very important.

2. Over - exertion can easily turn into chronic stress, which affects our ability to perform.

The brain is constantly scanning the environment for potential threats and adjusting the body's state to deal with them. When it detects that we're facing problems and challenges, it makes the body enter a stress response mode, exerting 100% of its strength to confront the challenges. This is acute stress.

Appropriate acute stress is good, but once this stress lasts too long, it will turn into chronic stress, which is harmful to the body.

For example, chronic stress can cause an abnormal increase in cortisol. Excessive cortisol can inhibit the hippocampus's ability to transmit information, affecting our memory.

Another example is that chronic stress can weaken the blood - brain barrier of the brain, allowing more inflammatory factors to enter the brain, damaging the reward circuit, and reducing our motivation.

...

In short, once we're too eager to solve a problem, this over - exertion may often cause the body to overwork, resulting in the negative effect of “more haste, less speed”.

3. Over - exertion can easily lead to a broken feedback loop, thus falling into emotional fluctuations and troughs.

We know that we need feedback to keep doing anything. The more resources we invest and the longer we persist, the more feedback we need. Otherwise, we'll “run out of steam”.

The over - exertion mode is a state of continuous and high - intensity resource input. The feedback it requires is much higher than in normal situations.

If we can get immediate feedback—just like when playing a game to defeat monsters and clear levels—there won't be any problem. But real life is often not so ideal. More likely, we invest a large amount of resources in a short period, but the feedback won't come as expected.

This will lead to the fact that in the “hard - working mode”, our feedback loop is easily broken, making us fall into the mire of emotions such as impatience, anxiety, uneasiness, fear, and annoyance...

This will not only seriously slow down our progress in solving problems but also strengthen our negative reactions when encountering problems.

4. Over - exertion can easily activate the prevention - focus mode, resulting in focusing on minor details while overlooking the major ones.

What is the prevention - focus mode? Let me give a few examples:

When a person goes on a trip, the normal thing to do should be to enjoy the journey. But he calculates every moment: Since I've come here with great effort, I should try to save time, plan my route, and visit more places. I've already seen this place, so don't waste time. Hurry up to the next place so that I won't have made this trip in vain...

If you treat a trip as a task and always think about how to “maximize the benefits”, can you really enjoy the journey? I don't think so.

Another example is setting a goal to read 50 pages of a book every day. As a result, you stare at this goal every day and make sure to finish reading these 50 pages even if you just skim through them. Even if you don't know what you've read after finishing, you'll be satisfied as long as you achieve this KPI.

Can you really gain something from this? Probably not.

This is the prevention - focus mode. Its essence is to take an “ideal indicator” as the passing line and think that only by reaching this indicator is it considered qualified; otherwise, it's not. So, you'll spend too many resources on monitoring whether you've “reached the indicator” and ignore the real experience, accumulation, and harvest.

In other words, this mode actually takes the means as the end and takes “reaching the indicator” as the harvest itself.

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Of course, it doesn't mean that “exertion” will definitely lead to these problems. It just means that it has a higher probability of activating these four situations, which will hinder our handling of things.

So, for some problems that we still have time to deal with and don't need to solve immediately, cultivating a relaxed mindset and giving the brain more freedom to play, brew, digest, and pre - process may achieve better results.

So, how can we cultivate a relaxed mindset?

Let me share some of my personal experiences. I hope they can help you.

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1. Train your ability to relax

Obviously, the first step in cultivating a relaxed mindset is to relax both your body and brain from tension. This can be achieved through daily training.

1. Consciously control your breathing. This is the simplest way to relax. Breathe through your nose, using abdominal breathing. Breathe slowly and deeply, about 6 - 10 breaths per minute. This can effectively activate the parasympathetic nervous system and calm your mind.
2. Progressive relaxation: First, consciously tense the local muscles and hold for about 5 seconds, then slowly relax the corresponding muscles for about 30 seconds. Start from the head, neck, shoulders, then move to the body, hands, legs, and finally to the toes. This can make your body better feel “relaxation” and thus relieve fatigue.
3. Cultivate some hands - on hobbies. For example: building blocks, baking, cooking, gardening, handicrafts, painting... Let these activities provide a sense of security and fulfillment for your brain and become your “backyard of the soul”. They can provide you with peace when you're feeling anxious.
4. Get closer to nature. When we exert ourselves, we're constantly in a “top - down” state of attention. In nature, this state is relieved, and we'll switch to a “bottom - up” mode. The direct feeling is that you'll feel more peaceful, calm, and relaxed, and the noisy voices in your mind seem to disappear for a while.
5. Try daydreaming. Find a nice corner, temporarily turn off your brain's thinking, open your senses, and focus on listening, looking, smelling, and feeling everything around you. Let your whole body relax, let your tense nerves stretch out, and your body and mind will feel as comfortable and free as if you've taken a hot bath.
6. Communicate with friends. Social connections are the most powerful way to give us strength and support. Try to make some close friends, preferably those you can meet in person offline. When you're under pressure and feeling tense, meeting and chatting with friends and doing things together can extremely effectively relieve stress.

Try to internalize these methods into your daily life and make them your habits. This can help you relax subconsciously when you're feeling tense and avoid over - exertion for a long time.

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2. Build a proactive mindset

Consider two different situations:

Situation one: Regard the problem as a nuisance, think that it has disrupted your stable life, and try to solve and overcome it as soon as possible so that life can return to normal and become peaceful again, avoiding spending time and energy on it.

This is a passive state of dealing with problems and also an “over - exertion” state. People who are used to this state are likely to feel that their lives are always “encountering things” and that they're constantly struggling to solve various problems in life. As a result, their sense of happiness will be lower, and they'll also feel that their lives are not under their control.

Situation two is like this: Regard the problem as an opportunity. Think that life is a process of constantly “leveling up” by solving one problem after another. Encountering problems is normal, and it means that you've opened up a new field that you haven't explored before and learned about your blind spots.

This is a proactive mindset. When you encounter a problem, you don't rush to solve it but regard it as a normal part of life. Thus, the brain can jump out of the state of stress and threat and handle it more easily.

This mindset can't be established overnight. It may take a relatively long time to adapt. The following sentences may help you change your mindset better:

We can't control the external world. It's unrealistic to demand “not to encounter problems” and “not to face difficulties”. The external world has its own rules, and we can't decide or interfere with them. The only thing we can control is our own ability. Therefore, every problem is an opportunity for us to gain experience. It's precisely because we've solved the current problem that we'll become a little stronger in the future.

Problems are originally a part of life. The reason they appear must be that we have some blind spots or some imperfect aspects. Therefore, they are a way for us to become more perfect. Problems are not our enemies but our partners.

We don't get happiness from “having no problems” but from “solving problems”.

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3. Increase your body's budget

The brain constantly scans our internal physical state to build an internal prediction framework.

In other words, our physical constitution is an important part of the brain's prediction framework of “what we can do”. Your physical state often subtly determines “what your upper limit is”.

This is a physical budget. Many times, precisely because the brain judges that we're “not strong enough”, it will react more violently to problems and stress, either avoiding them or trying to “exert force” to solve them in a short time to minimize the time we face them.

So, if you want to make your mind stronger and be able to handle problems more relaxedly and effortlessly, the most basic thing is to improve your physical constitution.

Get enough sleep, have a balanced diet, exercise appropriately, avoid the damage caused by long - term bad living habits to your body, and try not to have any weaknesses.

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4. Maintain a stable life

This point may be easily overlooked by many people, but it's actually very important.

When many people encounter problems, they're prone to fluctuations in their mindset or behavior. They're likely to change their living habits for the problem, cancel many other things, become emotionally unstable, have trouble sleeping and eating, and be obsessed with this one thing...

This is actually a manifestation of the lack of a sense of internal order: Your life is too unstable and too easily shaken by external waves.

A better approach is to maintain a stable life. Do what you should do and live as you normally do. A problem has come? Great. Put it into the list of things to be dealt with every day and allocate some time and energy to think about it. Besides that, don't let it affect your daily life. Try to follow a stable and established pattern.

In this way, you can soothe your brain and let it know that you have the ability to confront and eliminate unstable factors.

The more stable your internal order and daily life are, the stronger your ability to cope with shocks will be.

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Let me briefly summarize today's content:

Many people tend to over - exert themselves when encountering problems and try to solve them in a short time. But this often backfires. On the contrary, doing things with a relaxed mindset may yield better results.

The reasons are that over - exertion may have the following drawbacks:

Over - reliance on convergent thinking restricts your vision; It leads to chronic stress and reduces your coping ability; The feedback loop breaks, leading to an emotional trough; Relying on the prevention - focus mode leads to focusing on minor details while overlooking the major ones.

We can cultivate a relaxed mindset in the following ways:

Deliberately train your ability to relax and internalize it into your daily habits; Build a proactive mindset and regard problems as opportunities and experiences; Increase your body's budget to strengthen the brain's confidence in you; Maintain a stable life and use the sense of internal order to resist shocks.

I hope today's article can give you some inspiration and help.