Today, I'd like to share a list with you, hoping it can help you deal with low - mood issues.

Of course, it's even better if you don't have this kind of trouble.

First, take a deep breath

When we're exposed to negative external stimuli, whether it's anger, anxiety, or annoyance... it activates our sympathetic nervous system, putting our body in a stress state, getting ready for "fight or flight".

This stress state helps us better cope with challenges, but it's also the root cause of our discomfort and unhappiness. Frequent exposure to the stress state can cause a series of damages to our body and brain.

How can we quickly get out of this state? The most effective way is to activate our parasympathetic nervous system, so as to regain control of our body, instead of being controlled by our innate "danger perception".

The simplest and most effective way to activate the parasympathetic nervous system is to take slow, deep breaths.

Experiments have shown that breathing about once every 10 seconds (5 - second inhalation and 5 - second exhalation) can fully increase the oxygen content in the blood, stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, and synchronize the breathing frequency with brain waves, allowing us to quickly enter a calm state.

Interestingly, studies on religious chanting and prayer have found that they often reduce the breathing rate to 5 - 6 times per minute, which is about once every 10 seconds. This might be why they can make people calm and relaxed.

So, when you're in a bad mood, try taking a 10 - second deep breath. Remember to close your mouth and breathe through your nose for about 5 - 10 minutes. You'll find that you've unconsciously calmed down and can view the problems that trouble you with a better mindset.

Look at yourself from a third - person perspective

Everyone has a characteristic: when your friend has a problem, you can be very objective, rational, and calm, and can always see the whole picture of things better than him. However, when you're the one in the situation, you're likely to be upset and unable to think calmly.

The reason is simple: when we face a problem ourselves, the "psychological distance" between us and the problem is very close. So, we need to spend a large amount of cognitive resources to offset the threat brought by the problem. As a result, the remaining cognitive resources for us to think are very limited.

Therefore, a very effective way is to artificially increase the psychological distance between us and the problem.

I highly recommend imagining that it's not you who has the problem, but a friend in a very similar situation. You need to comfort and guide him now. What would you say? How might you help him analyze the gains and losses and weigh the pros and cons?

Once you increase the psychological distance from the problem, you may find that the shadow cast by the problem immediately fades a lot. Your thinking seems to break free all of a sudden, and you can clearly see many things you couldn't see before and discover many ideas you ignored.

This may not solve the problem, but it can broaden your perspective, reduce the psychological burden caused by the problem, and enable you to take better actions and make decisions.

Remember: Most of the consequences we worry about won't actually happen

There's a very useful rule I call the "97% rule". What does it mean?

I've mentioned an experiment in books and articles many times: about 85% of the things we worry about never happen. If the things we worry about do happen, 79% of the results are much better than we imagined. (Borkovec et al., 1999)

That is to say, among all our worries, only about 3% are reasonable, and the other 97% are exaggerated by us.

Is it worth spending 100% of our energy on constant anxiety, thinking, and annoyance for this mere 3% of possible consequences?

This is the 97% rule, a belief that has helped me get through many troubles and pressures.

Based on this rule, we can get two interesting inferences:

Inference 1: Since 97% of the things we worry about won't happen, if you think of a terrible consequence, the probability that it falls within the 97% range is obviously much higher than that within the 3% range. Therefore, this consequence probably won't happen.

So, if you're very afraid of something and worried about a bad result, please remember: just because you think of this result doesn't mean it will happen. In fact, the opposite is likely true: thinking of this result means it has a very high probability of not happening.

Inference 2: To deal with the uncertain 3%, we should promptly free ourselves from unnecessary stress and annoyance, eat well, sleep well, exercise, and make preparations in advance. When this 3% happens, we can deal with it better.

Remember this "97% rule" and these two inferences firmly. They'll be the best weapons for you to get rid of anxiety and annoyance.

Go exercise and get your body moving

If the above methods have limited effects on you and you're still in a low - mood state, there's a "quick - fix" solution: immediately start exercising.

Both aerobic and anaerobic exercises are okay, such as push - ups, using dumbbells, running, or other daily exercises. You can increase the intensity a bit to fully activate your body.

Why? There are two good effects.

1. Exercise can promote the body to produce endorphins. As we all know, endorphins are pain - relieving substances. Many people feel a very "cool" feeling after exercise, which largely comes from endorphins.

This substance also works for the pain in our brains. When you're troubled and tortured by problems and difficulties, producing endorphins through exercise can effectively eliminate the pain and unhappiness in your brain and make you feel "reborn".

2. Exercising the body can make us subconsciously feel "stronger", thus increasing our courage to face difficulties and challenges.

Our brain's consciousness doesn't only come from the brain itself but also from our body. The brain is actually scanning our body all the time, obtaining information about the body's state to analyze "what we can do" and "what we can't do".

Therefore, exercising the body is also a way to exercise the brain from another perspective - it's like sending a signal to the brain that "I'm getting stronger", which enhances the brain's confidence in facing difficulties.

List the people who can help you

When we're in a negative mood, our brain tends to go to extremes. It will constantly and repeatedly ruminate on negative information, keep thinking of it in a worse direction, and keep asking ourselves in our hearts, "What if the worst - case scenario happens?"

At this time, it's advisable to give it a counter - force to make ourselves clearly realize that things aren't that bad, and these are probably just the brain's delusions.

Where can this counter - force come from? Picking up a pen and listing the people you can turn to for help, those who can listen to you, and those who can stand by your side is a good way.

Human beings are social animals by nature. Therefore, people can always gain strength and positive emotions from interacting with others. The most important thing to avoid is the belief that "I have to handle all problems myself", which is not advisable as it will only continuously add pressure to you.

Pick up a pen and list the people around you who are willing to support and accompany you, those you instinctively think of and who can give you support and help. Think about:

If the consequence you don't want to see really happens, who can you turn to for help? What can they do for you? What might they say to you? How might they accompany and encourage you?

If possible, you can directly talk to them. Tell them the problems you're facing and seek their understanding, empathy, and listening.

You can even try to talk to ChatGPT. I've tried it, and the effect is quite good. Of course, this is just a stop - gap measure. It's better to communicate with acquaintances and friends.

Remember: You're never alone. The strength gained from the connections around you is our greatest support in facing difficulties.

Recall past wonderful experiences

Open your photo album and find those unforgettable and wonderful memories. You can choose a photo and ask yourself: In what situation was this photo taken? What wonderful memories does it bring you? Can you still recall the scene at that time, feel the pictures, sounds, smells, and emotions?

You can also take out your diary and find the records that made you happy or grateful. Ask yourself: What's the whole story of this event? What made you happy? Can you still recall that happy feeling?

When we take a "self - immersive" approach to our past wonderful experiences, these positive emotions can flow back from our memories and quickly reach us at this moment. Thus, it helps us quickly get out of negative emotions and allows us to have a better state and more resources to rationally examine the negative information we're facing.

It should be noted that these experiences are better to be more personal and private, preferably closely related to your personal characteristics - such as your first - time award - winning experience, the experience of being publicly praised, or your first - time dating experience... This can provide you with a stronger sense of belief and strengthen your self - identity and sense of value.

Furthermore, when we feel positive emotions and happiness, the activity of our ventral striatum increases, and the secretion of cortisol decreases, which helps us better face stress and negative emotions.

So, in daily life, you can develop the habit of recording more wonderful and comfortable moments and collecting them. Take them out and savor them when needed.

They'll become the source of your strength and belief, injecting endless motivation into you.

Watch a healing film

What can provide the most healing effect for us and make us temporarily forget about stress and anxiety? It's the connection with nature.

If possible, go to nature, find a tree, a forest, a river, or a mountain. Try to close your eyes and feel the rustling of the wind through the leaves, the flapping of birds' wings, the moist smell of the air, the heat of the sun on the stones, and the silence of the empty surroundings...

But maybe not many people have this condition. In that case, watching a film about nature can also have a similar effect. (Valtchanov et al., 2010)

It can be a documentary about the natural ecosystem, or about scenery, travel, food, and culture... As long as it can immerse you in it.

Of course, the more diverse the elements, the better. It would be even better if it has both natural scenery and cultural documentaries, allowing you to understand the local scenery and customs and specifically experience the local life.

The only requirement is to choose something as far from your daily life as possible and not related to your work and life (this is the opposite of the previous point). Because this can easily trigger your default mode network (DMN) and arouse the distractions in your mind again.

Communicate with friends offline and do things together

The above methods may be enough to help you get out of a low - mood and poor - state. Now, I'll share a few more tips to improve our daily "emotional immunity" so that we can better control our feelings.

An important point is to meet friends offline more often. You can just have a casual chat, share your recent situations, or do some activities together.

In this digital age, many people may be used to online socializing. However, online communication can't replace offline communication in many cases - after all, the Internet has only been around for less than 70 years, while our brains have evolved for millions of years.

When communicating with friends offline, the prefrontal lobe of the brain will be fully stimulated and exercised, which can't be achieved through online communication. And the exercise of the prefrontal lobe can, in turn, strengthen our ability to control our thoughts and emotions, preventing us from being overwhelmed by negative emotions.

On the other hand, offline socializing can make you feel a stronger sense of connection and "being needed" compared to online communication. This will greatly improve your stress - resistance ability.

You can set the frequency according to your actual situation. It's best to have offline meetings with friends at least once a week. The ideal situation is to meet every day, but it may not be easy to achieve.

In addition to communicating with old friends, you can also participate in some activities you're interested in and make some new like - minded friends. This can also have a similar effect.

Create and develop the habit of hands - on work

Many problems in daily life actually have a common cause: the lack of dopamine.

Many people think dopamine is the "happiness hormone", but it's not. The real function of dopamine is to provide us with motivation. If a person lacks dopamine, they're likely to appear listless, lack motivation, be uninterested in anything, and not want to do anything.

In this case, when facing problems and difficulties, they're likely to be very negative and have difficulty taking actions to solve the problems.

However, dopamine doesn't appear out of thin air, and it's difficult to directly supplement it through food (sweets can, but they're not healthy). Therefore, a better way is to establish a set of methods and systems to promote the brain to release dopamine.

One of the most effective methods is to continuously send signals to the brain like "I've completed another thing" or "I've achieved another accomplishment". This will highly activate our reward circuit and keep our dopamine level at a relatively healthy and stable level.

You can try this: Make a to - do list. When you think of something you can try or explore, write it down and then arrange time to do it. Check off an item after you finish it. Also, if you achieve something, save it and write it in your "achievement log".

These achievements can be very small. For example, you try AI painting and draw a picture you like, or you answer a question in a group and receive sincere thanks from others. These are all okay.

Over time, it will become your confidence in facing difficulties and pressures.

Widen your perspective and view problems from a longer - term perspective

What's the reason why most problems trouble us? It's because we take a "close - up shot" to examine them closely.

Many times, when you face a problem directly, you may feel hopeless and at a dead end. But this feeling may not be real. It's just that your attention and cognitive resources are completely occupied by it, so you unconsciously magnify it in your mind.

Therefore, a simple and effective suggestion is: If you're anxious about something in front of you, take a step back, widen your view, and look at the problem from a longer - term and higher perspective. Extend the time frame to half a year, a year, five years, or even your whole life.

How serious is this problem on a one - year scale? Five years? Ten years? Twenty years? Your whole life?

Once you widen your perspective, you may find that it's just an insignificant wave in our long and fulfilling life, and it may not even count as a "twist".

Our life is rich and long. Don't waste your precious time on the internal strife caused by these small problems in front of you.